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ϟ this is the nonsense of love

I.
our kiss is a secret handshake, a password.
we love like spies, like bruised prize fighters,

like children building tree houses.
our love is serious business.

one look from you and my spine reincarnates as kite string.

when i hesitate to hold your hand,
it is because to know is to be responsible for knowing.

II.
there is no clean way to enter
the heavy machinery of the heart.

just jagged cutthroat questions.
just the glitter and blood production.

III.
the truth is this:
my love for you is the only empire
i will ever build.

when it falls,
as all empires do,
my career in empire building will be over.

i will retreat to an island.
i will dabble in the vacation-hut industry.
i will skulk about the private libraries and public parks.

I will fold the clean clothes.
i will wash the dishes.
i will never again dream of having the whole world.

I’ve worm the same shirt 3 days in a row.

Have you ever heard that song called Blood Bank?

You should.  

I don’t really know the people I see everyday.

People take people I care about away from me.

I wonder how many people I’ve taken away from people that care about them.

I wish she hadn’t taken you away from me.

Or maybe, I wish I didn’t think she had.

I don’t have many things figured out.

People are so easily beautiful.

I see more beautiful people in a given day than I can count.

I don’t think you understand that beauty comes from within.

You’re not as attractive as you think you are.

Thinking you’re good-looking actually takes it away.

Do you know that song Holocene?

You should.

It’s going to be playing in my head when I marry you.

I don’t like reading if I’m not sitting on the floor.

I like shirts with buttons.

Mostly because I need something to do with my hands when I talk.

Do you know that song So Long, Lonesome?

That’s the song I always listen to before I go to sleep.